He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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