I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
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I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
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Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
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