Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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