Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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