I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like heaven, but drunker
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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