she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Randomize