I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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