You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
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full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
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They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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