His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
i need some magic done to my vagina
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize