At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
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If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
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My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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