So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
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