The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
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