made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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