They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize