Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
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So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
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I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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