remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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