You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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