My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
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I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
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we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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