I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
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