Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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