I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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