She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize