I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
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You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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