pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
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