vagina is talking i cant
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
try to milk me bitch
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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