My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Randomize