Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
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Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
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Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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