my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
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I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
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I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Let the clothes fall where they may.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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