i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
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she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
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bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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