you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize