she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
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