"it" just moved
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
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i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
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You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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