It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
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We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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