I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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