I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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