things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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