Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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