I'm going to jail i love you
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize