It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
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Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to fro yo and sex?
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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