and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize