I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
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