You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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