just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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