I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize