ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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