You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize