It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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