he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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