I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize