shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize